Get Your Ex Back

The 7 Most Common Mistakes With Your Ex

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After a separation, it is unfortunately normal to have separation anxiety, pain and other unpleasant feelings. It is because of these unpleasant feelings after a breakup, you can often make more mistakes. These errors can make it harder when you want to Get your ex girlfriend back.

You may know this famous saying: “The Intelligent learns from his own mistakes. The genius learns from the mistakes of others.” So let’s look at some of the most common mistakes you must avoid to get your ex girlfriend back.

Desperate Behavior

Desperate behavior is probably the most common mistake men make after a breakup. To get your ex girlfriend back, it is imperative to not act desperate.

You might have done the following things:

  • You told your ex how much you need them?
  • That you can not live without them?
  • Reasons why you should stay together?
  • You bought flowers or gifts for the ex-girlfriend?
  • You begged for forgiveness?

All this appears desperate to an ex girlfriend. Desperate behavior is very unattractive to your ex girlfriend.

What woman would want to be with someone who looks miserable and desperate?

One of the reasons that this error is so widespread, are love stories. In such films, ex boyfriends often does something “romantic” or tells his ex that he can not live without them. Unfortunately that does not happen in real life very often. You must do things differently if you want to win your ex girlfriend back. To get your ex girlfriend back, you need above all to keep your self-respect and dignity. This will not only help to get your ex girlfriend back, but also helps your self-esteem.

Too Frequent Contact

After a separation, it happens quite often that the man thinks that the ex-girlfriend does not know or does not understand how much they mean to them. And very often men constantly contact their ex-girlfriend – calls, visits, text messages, etc

If your ex-girlfriend decided to separate, then one can assume that she has not taken this decision lightly. It is unlikely that you will get your ex girlfriend back just because you show her how much she means to you. There are much better ways to get your ex girlfriend back. In fact, many counselors advise to not contact the ex girlfriend after the separation for at least 30 days. This is known as the no contact rule.

How can such a ban on contact help you get your ex girlfriend back?

First of all, to harass an ex girlfriend with phone calls or visits, these will certainly not convince her to suddenly change their minds.Instead, it will annoy them more. The beauty of the no contact rule is that it will arouse curiosity in most cases from your ex-girlfriend. Your ex-girlfriend will want to contact you herself! It may take several days or several weeks until your ex-girlfriend call’s you. You have to be patient and use this time to make a good plan to prepare to get your ex girlfriend back and focus on your happiness.

Disagree With Your Ex

While many make the mistake of acting desperate – some also make the opposite mistake: they have huge fights with their ex-girlfriend’s. If you want to get your ex girlfriend back, then such conflicts will certainly not help you to win your ex back.

If you are among those who has had many arguments with your ex girlfriend, then it is a good idea to write your ex a kind letter and to say two things:

  • that you understand the separation decision from your ex
  • and that you agree with the separation.

When you suddenly agree with the separation, the ex-girlfriend will now be less certain whether the separation was actually a good idea. This action facilitates the change to a friendly tone to win over the ex-girlfriend back later. You should then wait for the ex-girlfriend to contact you. Stay friendly, but without seeming desperate. All this will increase your chances of winning back your ex girlfriend. If the friendly contact with ex is restored, then you can begin to seduce your ex back in small steps. Now the second time it should be easier because you already know what she likes and does not like.

Make Your Ex Jealous

Perhaps you have considered whether you should make your ex-girlfriend jealous, for example by seeing other women. If you want to win your ex back, it will not help you in the long run to get your ex girlfriend jealous. Even if you manage to make the ex-girlfriend jealous, it will come with negative consequences. Your ex-girlfriend might think that you definitely do not want to get together with her again. Even if you then manage to win your ex girlfriend back, she might resent you for a long time because you have made her jealous. In other words, trying to make your ex jelous is poison to the relationship over the long term and would make it difficult to stay together with your partner.

Try To Get Her Back Too Quickly

Another common mistake is to try to see your ex girlfriend too quickly. Thus, at the slightest sign that you might have your ex girlfriend back, it could go wrong and she will be gone for good. It’s just not a good idea to make the first meeting, call your ex-girlfriend or send her a love letter first.

To win back your ex girlfriend, it’s usually better to lead your ex in small steps back into your previous relationship. It may be that the ex-girlfriend takes some time for herself and is more distant. The best way you can do it is make the whole thing as if it were the beginning of a new relationship and slowly seduce your ex girlfriend again. This increases your chances of a successful long-term relationship.

Isolate From People

During a painful separation many of us make the mistake of isolating themselves from friends and other people. I have personal experience as I have made this mistake too. It can be difficult in the beginning to take the first step and get back to your normal life. But it is worth it to get back to what you like to do and seek out new and exciting activities. Go be with your friends and family, or start a new hobby, no matter what or are feeling. The main thing is, you want to have fun doing it. Although it initially feels like you do not want to do things or go out with peoples, this will help you later in getting back together with your ex girlfriend. You may only need to go to these people several times before you begin to see the positive effects.

This will help you when you are back in contact with your ex girlfriend. She will see that you’re okay, then you are much more attractive to her. Her whole attitude and your charisma will be more optimistic and fun-loving – and that can not be faked. It can hardly be overstated how important a positive, cheerful attitude is to win back an ex girlfriend. It may take some time before you have processed the pain of separation. If you do not feel better again, you should not begin to get your ex girlfriend back as it will have negative consequences.

Sinking In Negative Thoughts

It is also important to divert your thoughts from your ex-girlfriend and separation. Otherwise you risk being miserable and obsessed with all the negative thoughts like:

  • I’m not good enough
  • I’ll never find someone like her
  • It’s all my fault
  • If only I had done this or not done that

You know what I mean and it’s probably not hard to see why it’s a good idea to get out of these negative thoughts and self-blame. This applies regardless of whether you want to win your ex girlfriend back or not. To come out of the vicious circle of negative thoughts, you make the conscious decision to deal with other things, in particular with those that give you fun and joy. If you are so inclined, you can also try to bring the idea to a relaxed atmosphere like during meditation or relaxation exercises. As well, massages can work wonders on your stress levels.

You can win the battle to get your ex girlfriend back. It will take some effort but mainly knowledge, but it can be done. I am rooting for you.


Anna Perkins is a relationship writer who offers her own forthright opinion over the worlds of dating, romance, relationships , marriage and friendships. She loves cats, traveling, spending time with her son and husband.

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